Monday, July 30, 2012

Black couples: destined for bad relationships

For the past thirty years or so, more and more black children have been raised in single parent households. Of course, one parent (with a stable mind) is more than capable of raising a child.  However, the lack of a parent, and normally the father, has made it difficult for black kids to find and maintain a solid relationship when they become adults.

Prior to the 1970s, there were far more two-parent households, allowing children to better understand the roles of mother and father.  If father was upset after a hard day of work, mother would explain why daddy's in a grumpy mood.  If mother was having an abnormally emotional day, father would sometimes make the effort to tend to mother's needs.  The child would see these encounters and comprehend the roles that men and women play within a relationship.

Within single parent households, a great deal of this communication is missed.  Gender roles are not visualized, and changes in adult behavior is not explained; therefore, when the child becomes an adult, it becomes difficult to comprehend exactly what is needed and what is expected from their partner.  Being happy within the relationship is all that is understood; and when the happiness seemingly disappears, the relationship eventually ends.

So what can be done about this?  How can black folks build or strengthen their relationships with their loved ones. Well, its' simple....find a way to communicate.  Rediscover the needs of your partner. Make the effort to know everything that there is to know.  Because basically, you were going into a relationship minus the necessary tools to be successful.

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