Thursday, May 2, 2013

The Fake Orgasm: What Works For Her Also Works For Him

The ole fake's a wonderful thing, yes? No?  Well, we've know about it for years.  He wants to get some, but you have to get up early for work  The next thing you know, there's a fake orgasm.  He feels good, and you feel good because now you can rest up for tomorrow's early workday. Everybody's happy, right?

Well, there's also another side to the matter.  He fakes his orgasm  too.  Say whaaat?!   That's right.  He fakes it.  And in the day of necessary condom wear, how can you tell the difference?  Firstly, we're not talking about couples who are trying to conceive, or devout couples who are not concerned with child-birth.  We're talking about couples who are regularly using protection; and thus, making if difficult for her to tell if he's uhmm.... finished.

First of all, he cares about you... because why else would he fake an orgasm.  I mean, that's how you felt about him when you faked yours, right?  You don't want to hurt the other's feelings.  So here's how it works. You're putting the pressure on him to have an orgasmic experience; and maybe sometimes, at the same time as you.  However, he's having a little difficulty having one at that very moment. You're there and you're ready.  He's involved, but he's not. Next thing you know, there's the ole fake orgasm.  He excuses himself while he goes into the bathroom.  And what happens there?  Well...he finishes the job.  Is this a sad moment?  Indeed it is; but it does happen.

So what's the solution?  Well, one may say "why bother, he normally gets his before I do anyway."  Well, in today's world where there may be drugs or alcohol involved which may desensitize his body part down there, or maybe he's just not quite in to it on that particular day; in time, the issue will need addressing.  So, what's the solution? Well... just end all the fakeness.  Men, be honest with your lady. If she's being pushy, tell her that she's being a freakin' prude; but uhmmm...just not during the act, okay? And ladies, if he wants to get it in and you have to get up early the next day, then just tell him that you're gonna have a long day tomorrow, and that you'll make it up with extras at a later time.  Believe me, he'll understand.  I mean, come on... anything that has to do with extras is an attention-getter.

Communication is the key here, and also trust.  So fellas, if you see her follow you into the bathroom on your routine trip to remove you uhmm, "wrapping"...well uh, just show her the proof that she so desperately seeks and keep it movin'.

And later on for kicks, maybe uh...ask her to do the same?  Hahaha... Ewww!