Tuesday, February 12, 2013

6 Reasons To Dump A Guy The Day After Valentine's Day

Most men despise Valentines Day.  And it's not necessarily because he doesn't love you; but mainly because he has to deal with the pressures that go along with buying gifts.  Ladies, you know what I'm talking about.  He's watching the game.. then all of sudden there goes that freakin' Jared commercial.  You know the one, "he went to Jared?" Jared??!  What-the-hell does Jared have to do with your relationship?  He just met you a month ago! 

However, there are some men who are just plain trifling when it comes to giving gifts on Valentine's Day.  The ones who have no intention of celebrating a day specifically made for lovers.  So today, I'm gonna put these guys on front streetand expose them for pricks they really are.  Here today are six reasons why you should dump your man the day after Valentine's Day.  Enjoy. 

1.  If he tells you that he doesn't celebrate Valentine's Day and never has...dump him.  First of all, unless he practices a particular religion or two, he's probably telling you a lie.  He has indeed celebrated V-Day in his lifetime.  He's just trying to condition you to feel the same. Wow.. the Pavlov-prick-type.  smh.  Dump him girl.

2. If you've known him for over twelves months and he buys his mother a gift that's far better than yours...rid him please.  There may be a momma issue there.  Geeze!  Who needs that?!

3. If he communicates with his ex on, or around, Valentine's Day.  I mean, WOAH!!  Where they do that at?  Obviously there's something still going on with ole boo...drop him girl!

4.  If this is the second consecutive year that he's forgotten V-day?  Uhmm, just work towards leaving him, girlfriend.  He's just trying to convince you that he's that guy with the bad memory.  It's all game.  And I know this for certain...used it myself once upon a time.

5.  If he takes you out to dinner and then eye-hustles another woman for longer than one minute...pay no attention to him; he's just temporarily stuck on stupid.  If he looks at a woman during the entire time that he's eating his appetizer?  Then just don't give him any when the two of you get home.  But if he's visually locked on some chick as he's eating his entree, and pays little attention to you on the day of pronounced love?...please, leave this fool.  I mean, where you meet him at anyway?  Geeze!!

6.  And finally, if he uses the old penis-in-a-box gift more than once.. sigh.  You see, the first time he did that you just wrote it off as him being silly; plus, it was Valentine's Day and you were a little horny.  I mean..who isnt?  But to do the same thing twice??  Oof!!  Leave him, girl.  Leave him fast.   However, we do appreciate the fact that you allowed us to try it that one time.  Thanks.

So, if your boo practices Valentine behavior similar to those mentioned above then I advise you to immediately search for another.  Because, it's freakin' Valentine's Day.  And everybody deserves to feel loved at least one day out of the year.  

Well.. I guess they do.

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